kevin left this morning with ed gein
at least they'll be back on the 22nd so i'll get to see him before a huge long 2 month span of not seeing him. having him here was the greatest. and i guess the good news is for all my friends here, i'm not moving to NY and no it doesn't really bother me that i'm not. all i care about at this moment is being with kevin, and he's moving here, and i'm happy about that. its great how he got along with my family and my family liked him. and how all my friends liked him. can't wait for him to come back so we can all ride bikes together and cause tons of problems haha.

i miss him so much
its so quiet around here without him
its weird coming home from work and he isnt here
makes me pretty sad.
at least the pillow still smells like him :D

kevin has been here for a week now
and it has been one of the best weeks of my life
i love him lots.
<33

i've decided that i want extentions again, and i want them kinda long. i also want to put colors in, and then turn the color extentions into dreads. i like dreads, but i don't want a whole head, and i don't really know if i want to do it to my actual hair yet. at least not for awhile. this is really hard to do with working at joanns. everything seems so conservative there, and it kinda sucks...because that is totally not me. i keep telling myself only 4 months. only 4 months, and then i can be out of there, and out of this state. but back to the extentions, someone help meeeeeeeeee. i just want to glue them in or something. i'm so sick of my hair now. i should have never cut my bangs. sometimes i do stupid things.......awsome.

thats all i have to say for now.
goodnight i guess.

my interview with the lady from OIG went alright this morning. i really hope all of this just gets cleared up. she was really nice and answered all the questions that I and my dad had. it really helped that my dad was there too. it was nice. soo now its just sit around and waste this thursday friday and saturday. i have no work. amazing. haha. the new job is alright, don't know how much i like it, and it doesn't pay very well, ugh. my dad said that the county was hiring jailers. he told me i should go apply, haha. i think i could pass everything but the physical test. that i spell really bad. i'm going to think about it. i really wish i could just tell my dad about my plans for moving, but for some reason i can't. and i don't know why. i have some ideas of what he would say to it, one being how its sooooo expensive to live there. but whatever. i know he also doesn't like my idea for going to cosmotology school. so yeah, thats another thing to deal with. he doesn't even know i have a boyfriend...haha. that is how much i really talk to my dad about stuff. maybe one day i'll go over and talk to my stepmom first, i'm really glad that as i've gotten older, my relationship with her has gotten a lot better. i can actually tell her stuff and talk to her.

kevin had an interview today for a new job, i hope it gets it, i think it will make his whole mood a little better. and he'll be making the amount he should be doing the work that hes doing. at least everything is still going really good with that. if i didn't have kevin to talk to sometimes, or just know that hes there, i don't know how i would do with things. or how i would be. oh, and thanks taylor for the text message you sent me the other day. it really made me feel really good. <3

speaking of taylor....went to the mall last night after eating some taco bell. some girls were staring at her as we drove by, she said some stuff about how she hates being stared at and then said whore really loud. apparently the girl heard it. so what does this girl do? she drove over to where we parked and was like, who are you calling a whore, and taylor just kinda laughed at her. the girl was like why don't you talk some more shit now, i'm here. i just kept walking and lauhged, this girl was trying to act tough, but the best part about it, was that she wouldn't even get out of her car. she kept reversing to be next to us, but not once got out of her car....so i called her a cunt, whatever. the girl drove off screaming whore or something like that. it was stupid, and made me laugh, too bad she didn't get out of the car. whatever.


well, now to waste my day, not sure what i should do.........

my myspace got hacked....and deleted.
re add me??

www.myspace.com/jessicore

if something doesn't change soon.
i'm packing up the shit i have and going to NY
with the way people are here, it wouldn't be any different going there. at least i know kevin would be pretty happy with the few friends he had there.
and the only people that would miss me here would be my family, and its not like i couldn't come and see them.

work is shit
and i won't even comment on the whole friends thing.
the one friend i feel i have, i don't get to see her much. cause our work scheduals are different and things are just really weird for the both of us. i wish i could go back a few months, and be able to hang out with her like i did before. nothing is the same anymore.

nothing.

at least if i was with kevin i would feel like i had something.
and i meant something to someone.

Kevin might be here at the beginning of september. i can only hope, i've been really really missing him. so now all i need to do is work on getting an apartment. i can't forget to call a few places tommrow. and hopefully everything works out well. i'm excited on the inside, but i'm not getting my hopes up, cause i don't really know. i have a lot of mixed feelings about everything. i'm not saying that i don't want to be with kevin, so don't even start thinking that. but i'm worried that he's just going to hate every minute here. i don't know. i hope everything works out okay. i would love to see him right now, i've really been missing him, and wishing i could go back to the beginning of july and be there for 6 days again.

other than that, work is okay. i REALLY need to switch, this lady is going to drive me crazy, and i'm gonna end up hitting her, not some kid. zumiez isn't bad at all. i quite enjoy it you could say, though i don't know if its working out like jrod hoped it would, its really hard to tell, i like being there and i have a good time. its a nice little extra job. not bad at all. really.

again...i need an apartment. i can't wait to find one, and get out of my house. i have a few ideas, i just have to talk to my mom about them, and then actually call the places. lets hope it all works out. my biggest worry is that i won't find or get anything at all. yeah, with kevin moving here, not good at all haha. wish me luck, seriously.

5 dogs in my house = me having a constantly stuffed up nose. sweet. work in about an hour, not really looking forward to it. i can't wait to switch to 2nd shift. really, then i can sleep at normal times. and i'll have my other job too. which should be a lot of fun, i'm pretty excited for it. which reminds me to not forget to call j-rod tommrow for my schedual. i can't forget.

next thursday i get my hair cut. though i debating if i really want to cut it the way i was thinking or doing something else. i don't know! oh well.

nothing else real exciting. i'm gonna go, sit in my room and talk to kevin.
<3

i guess no movie...i don't know. whatever. by next week i pretty much won't have any free time i'm going to start training at my new job and i'm pretty excited for it. so if you're mad at me for some reason, just tell me. don't avoid me. i don't like it much. i've talked to kevin for a little bit. he's now bulding ramps and riding bikes with matt. sweet. but he'll be here next month i hope for a little vist, and then soon after that he'll be here for good. and at this point, thats all i really care about. why i ever thought to just stay here, i'll never know, but its too late to change my mind now. i have 2 pretty deacent jobs now. and a few small other things going good for me. so whatever.

all of this is taking its toll on me. i cried again today, and i probably couldn't give you one set answer as to why. its just a whole group of things. i don't really know what to say. i got another job today, only really had one person to tell. my mom was happy for me too. which was nice. don't really know if kevin cares that much. hes too busy worring about his bike and riding with matt. so whatever. i work tonight, and i don't really want to, i don't feel like talking to another person right now. let alone, dealing with some stupid idiot. i kinda just want to be alone, big surprise there. and i'm hungry, i need some food. i'll guess i'll get something on my way to work.
well, i've got nothing else.